Goodbye Old Friend....

Peripheral neuropathy.

Defined by dictionary.com as Function: noun : a disease or degenerative state (as polyneuropathy) of the peripheral nerves in which motor, sensory, or vasomotornerve fibers may be affected and which is marked by muscle weakness and atrophy, pain, and numbness

You know what it feels like when your foot falls asleep?  Well imagine that intensified. Lucky me my friendship with neuropathy began after chemo ended.  I know I have written about it before, but really? After I am done with the toxic chemicals being injected into me I get a side effect.  Great. Thanks for that. A little bonus I wasn't expecting.

I started chemo on November 12th 2007 and finished up with (herceptin) treatment on December 29, 2008. I finished my chemo some time in April of 2008, I have the exact date in an old cell phone of mine,( have to get those milestone dates out of that phone before it gets tossed) My neuropathy started soon after that.

April 2008, and it just ended.  Or at least I hope.  I haven't had it in a couple of weeks.  So I guess it is gone.

December 2009~so that means my neuropathy, that tingling annoying pain sock, which was so painful at first that it was almost too much to bear, that tingling I got used to having, when I went to bed at night it would, if I was on my feet for a long period of time, would crawl up my leg up to my knee like spider creeping up its web, that after a while it was more of a nuisance that anything else, lasted longer than my treatment.  Longer than all of my treatments combined, including surgery, chemo, herceptin, and radiation. 

My treatment lasted 14 months.  My neuropathy lasted 20.

I almost don't want to post this blog, as if posting it will make it come back.

Ha ha but I am posting it anyway {gulp}

Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty Show Monday~Friday 10am-noon eastern standard time.  Listen live on wmktthetalkstation.com

Check out my podcast The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com

The Chart

I have been talking to a lot of survivors for my podcast The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com.  It has made me think of a lot of things that have happened to me.  I remember when I was diagnosed I actually thought to myself  "Well they must have someone else's chart."  Yeah right.  I live in a town of about 8 thousand people. My last name is Majoros.  I am the only Majoros in the phone book.  Pretty sure it was my diagnosis, unfortunately. I recall being really pissed at my doctor for not telling me what kind of breast cancer I had (the ultrasound tech told me  which I guess is a real no-no) at that time my chart was only a couple of pages. She showed me that she didn't have the info, flipping between the 5 pages in my chart.  Now its the size of a small book, the Gutenberg Bible of me.  Whenever I go to the doctor I look at my chart and wish it was much smaller, and that chart is only for 2 years. 

I was talking to another breast cancer survivor about her treatment, which was similar to mine, and we were discussing our side effects and medications.  Its kind of funny to think about it like we were discussing parts of a recipe, ok if you add zofran to your benadryl whisk lightly with herceptin, sleep for an hour, then repeat every three weeks you will feel better!!  We talked about hair loss, which I am still in awe of people who will go out in public with a bald head.  Those who know me know I am not that shy, but when it came to that I was.

We were talking about how taboo it used to be to even say the word cancer, it was spoken of in hushed tones.  Like you would say the whole sentence, then whisper the word cancer, as if to even speak it would bring it out like Beetlejuice.

Now many of my survivor friends shout it from the rooftops, well the modern version of it anyway, with blogs and podcasts and facebook posts and tweets.  We know what its like.  We want everyone to know about it.  We don't want anyone else to get it.  I personally don't want to welcome another person to the club no one wants to join.


Someone I respect called me a brave woman.  I still don't understand why.  I was told I had cancer.  I am kind of stubborn,  I don't back down from a fight.  If you play hockey against you know it doesn't matter if you are five foot six or six foot five, if you have the puck, and I want it I will go after it, I may not get it the first time, but dammit you will see me, you will hear me and you will remember me.


Mel is the producer/cohost of The Vic McCarty Show Monday -Friday 10am-noon eastern time.  Listen live on wmktthetalkstation.com 

Check out my podcast The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio. Available on demand now.

Win great Save the Tatas gear

Save the Tatas.  I have written about them before.  I have had the founder Julia Field Fikse on The Vic McCarty show.  They have always been great with giveaways.  Now I want to pass on the giveaways to you.  I have the t-shirts, sweatshirt, and hoodie seen here as well as the magnets, bumper stickers and two key chains.  All you have to do to get one is email me at thecancerwarrior@gmail.com  You will have to pay for shipping, but that is a pretty good deal for a sweatshirt, t shirt or sticker.   I will post winners here on my blog.

Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty Show.  Listen live Monday-Friday 10am-noon on www.wmktthetalkstation.com

Check out my podcast The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com available on demand now. 

Save the Tatas

 

I don't recall how I found out about the save the tatas company.  I know they were on The Vic McCarty show when I was going through treatment, and I liked their message. Yes cancer is serious business, being diagnosed and going to doctor visits and chemo and radiation for months at a time can take a toll on anyone.

That is why I like the Save the Tatas mission and message:

Laughter heals.  Of course.  I have blogged about my positive mental attitude and wicked sense of humor.  If I didn't have that I probably wouldn't have gotten through treatment.  Recently we had founder of Save the Tatas Julia Field Fikse on the Vic McCarty show.  She was telling us a story about her wearing the shirt below:

She told us this funny story about walking in Pasadena, CA and a car screeched right by her, and a guy yelled out of his car, I totally was!!!!  What a great story.  What a great message. I love the fact that they bring humor to breast cancer awareness. I am for anything that brings humor and a positive message to an important cause.

Its always surprising, when you are going through treatment, what will bring a smile to your face.  Save the Tatas did that and continues to do that for me now that i am post treatment and into survivorship.

One of my favorite products from Save the Tatas is Boob Lube.  Now I know what you are thinking and you can get your mind right out of the gutter.  It's the original breast check soap. It is a fun reminder for you to do your monthly breast self exams.

There are lots of companies out there that promote breast cancer awareness, but I haven't seen one as fun as Save the Tatas.

Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty show. Listen live Monday-Friday eastern standard time on wmktthetalkstation.com.

Check out my podcast The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com available on demand now

What are you thankful for?

Thanksgiving. A day off of work for most.  A day to spend with family, watch football and eat, eat eat.

Every family has their own tradition.  Doug and I go out to eat with his Dad and Uncle at the Perry Hotel, they put on a fantastic buffet and it is well known in the area for its food.

As I was eating the turkey and roast beef tonight I couldn't help but think what I am thankful for.  When I was diagnosed two years ago I had to give up alot in order to stay well.  I had to stop working at the serving job I had, not only could I not lift any trays because of the operation I had, the doctors told me I couldn't be there because of my low white blood cell count.  Being around a lot of people who potentially had colds wouldn't be good for my health, white blood cells fight infection, and mine being low I probably would have gotten really sick, like cancer wasn't enough of being sick right?  Luckily, as they say here in Northern Michigan a view of the Bay is half your pay, so like most people I had two jobs.  I was still able to work at the radio station.

There was a lot of food I couldn't eat.  I was advised not to eat fresh veggies during treatment, because they may not be washed properly.  You never really realize what you enjoy until you aren't able to have it.  I thought I really would kill someone for a big salad!!!  Some food I couldn't eat just because it was too hard on me, like anything acidic.  Tell that to someone whose mom makes awesome italian food!!! Tomatoes were off the list for a while.  Funny that I can still talk about food after stuffing my face today at the buffet.

I still worked but I was basically a hermit for a year.  For someone like me, not really a social butterfly, but I like being out with people, going out, hanging with friends.  It was work, doctor visits, home,sleep, eat, sleep, repeat.  Thank goodness that is over with.

I recently got the all clear from my oncologist.  Blood tests look good, mammography was normal.  See you in six months he said.  Got the same news from the radiologist, I don't need to see him until next year.  Hoping for a hat trick when I see my surgeon on Tuesday.

I am thankful for a lot of things, friends, family, all the people who have helped me through this, whether you realized it or not, thank you.

 

Nothing to fear?

I have been thinking about this post for a while.  Something that all survivors think about, but don't want to talk about. Fear of recurrence.  I don't know ANY friends of mine that are survivors who don't think about this at least at least once. Mostly during times close to doctors appointments.  Yeah that's right I have an oncology appointment in about a week.  Although I don't expect anything bad, there is always that thought, what if?  What if it comes back?  What if the meds I took to get rid of my breast cancer caused some other cancer, yes, that's right, side effects of some of the chemo drugs are other cancers.  I can almost picture one of those happy commercials for Adrymicin/Cytoxan, (the chemo drug that made my pee turn red and made my hair fall out) with the family out for a picnic talking about A/C and happily discussing the potential liver disease and bladder cancer you could get as one of the possible side effects.

Whenever my docs explained the side effects and listed them off, I remember I said no thanks I don't want any of those, as if I had a choice of side effects, no thanks to the seizures, but I will take the chills, fever and hallucinations.

 Fear of recurrence.  It is real.  It is a side effect that I believe every cancer survivor gets, funny how its not on any list that I have seen.  It doesn't happen often, mostly near doctors appointments, especially if I get a scan or a blood test, or near the anniversary of when I was diagnosed, when I had my surgery or some similar cancer related event.    Even unrelated tests can make you nervous.  I remember when my docs office called with the results of my pap test I held my breath a little until the nurse said normal.

As another oncology appointment approaches the thought is in the back of my mind. The odds are in my favor for being cancer free, but there is always that what if?

Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty show. Listen live Monday-Friday eastern standard time on wmktthetalkstation.com.

Check out my show The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com

This is in response to a New York Times article

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/03/health/03second.html?_r=3&scp=2&sq=mammograms&st=cse

(you may have to cut and paste this link to read)

Above is the link to the New York Times Article.  Above that is a mammography machine.  I have had about eight mammograms since I have been diagnosed with breast cancer at the ripe old age of 37, 3 years before  most women are recommended to get a mammogram at 40.  Now I am not a doctor, I have no medical background except the time I spent (over a year) going to the hospital for chemo treatments, radiation, doctor visits, blood tests, echocardiograms etc all relating to my cancer treatment.  This is my opinion, not fact.  I did not consult anyone in the cancer or medical field about this blog. The NY Times article made me angry.  Since I have had cancer I have written and spoken about the necessity of breast self exams and mammograms.  Now I don't know the background of the writer of the article, don't know if she has ever had a loved one or friend diagnosed with cancer of any kind, so I don't know if she knows the mental and physical toll it takes on a person going through treatment. I can't speak for her.  I can only speak for me.  In my opinion people 30 and above should get mammograms, and even earlier if there is a history in your family of it.  Anyone can get breast cancer.

When I read the paragraph from the article "Mammograms are no fun, to put it mildly. Like many women, I have been putting up with them in hopes that, if I get cancer, they might find it early enough to save my life and maybe help me avoid extensive surgery and chemotherapy Have I been kidding myself?"

Uh ok, putting up with them?  Really?  When I had my first mammogram the tech apologized about the pain it would cause when the machine would squish my breasts.  I laughed and told her well since she didn't create the machine its not her fault.

"Mammograms are no fun: " That is what the writer of the article says. I would take a few minutes, if that, of being uncomfortable, than the all the lovely baggage that comes along with a cancer diagnosis.

Let me tell you what, Denise Grady of the New York Times, cancer isn't fun either.

Talk to your doctor.  Do your breast self exams. In my opinion, get a mammogram.

Nothing is infallible, mammograms may not detect your cancer, but then again it might.

Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty Show. Listen live Monday-Friday 10am-noon eastern on wmktthetalkstation.com

Check out my new show The Cancer Warrior available on demand now on Empoweradio.com 

http://tinyurl.com/yfxvk8p  

Opportunity Knocks

Cancer Sucks

 Yeah we all can agree on that.  It takes a toll.  A physical and mental toll on you, your friends your family, pretty much everyone that is close to you.  People don't know how to react around you when you have it, the whispers, the stares.  The treatment kills everything, even the good cells,the equivalent of  medical napalm.  It makes you tired. Radiation makes you tired, hell everything makes you tired.  After your course of treatment you hope to hear one word: Remission.

Everything happens for a reason.  Or so I am told. That is a hard pill to swallow when your hair falls out and you feel like shit from a treatment that is supposed to make you better.

But you know what, I have to say I believe it.

Cancer has taken some things, but has given me more than I care to admit.  I eat healthier than I probably would have if I didn't have it, I work out more, well, I am a bit of a gym rat lately, just getting back in to hockey playing shape, I enjoy my friends my family and well, life in general.

I love my job as co-host/producer/partner in crime on The Vic McCarty show, a job I got because of cancer.

Because of cancer I was able to jump in on a startup of an internet radio station: Empoweradio.com.  I produce shows, and now I host my own show The Cancer Warrior.  I have been pretty lucky lately, good things have been happening.  Do I attribute it to cancer?  I guess I have to.  Opportunity knocked and I answered the door.  Would I have heard the knock if cancer hadn't of come into my life like a tasmanian devil, leaving a path of mental and physical destruction in its wake, forcing me to either cower in a corner, which, if you know me, just isn't my style, or get up and fight the devil,  winning the fight some days, some days losing, but eventually winning the battle.

I have to say that I have had a great attitude during all of this, I think if we all picture cancer looking like this:

it would be a hell of a lot less scarier.


Mel is the producer/co-host of The Vic McCarty Show. Listen live Monday-Friday 10am-noon eastern standard time on wmktthetalkstation.com 

Check out my new show The Cancer Warrior on Empoweradio.com available on demand