Monday, March 8, 2010

On the fence

Today I found out a friend of mine has cancer.  He has been keeping it a secret for some time.  I don't see him that much and all he said was that he was going in for some minor surgery. He didn't tell me, I heard it from a mutual friend.

It reminded me of when I was diagnosed.  I wanted to keep it a secret at first, it was so hard to believe that it could happen to me.  I had two jobs at the time so I told one boss, then the other, then most of my co~workers.  Telling the story over and over again was so hard at the beginning. I actually told one of my supervisors to tell the other employees at my job.  I couldn't keep telling the story over and over again.  It was right after diagnosis, before any treatments or surgeries, and it was like cutting open a fresh wound every time I would say I have cancer.

I know my friend wants his privacy.  I know its hard when its fresh and new.  You never think it could happen to you.  My friend is active, works out, and it is a total shock when you are diagnosed, when you hear those words.

I want to go to my  friend and give him a hug, tell him I am here for him. Give him support and tell him I am here for him and introduce him to the cancer community that I am a part of.

But he hasn't told me.

I will respect his wishes and wait until he tells me.

I am used to being on his side of the fence.  Being the fighter, ready for battle, taking on cancer, dealing with all the shit that comes with it.  Not being on the other side of the fence.

Being on either side of the fence sucks.

Mel is the producer/co~host of  The Vic McCarty Show.  Listen live Monday~Friday 10am~Noon eastern standard time on

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